ikeepitreal

March 3rd changed my life in so many ways. These are some of the ones I didn't expect.

Hygiene

I'm pretty much down to shaving once a week. Not because I don't have time (I'm not too busy -- I'm either here or at work) but because of a lack of energy. Today I went into work with an itchy 6 days of growth and huge bags under my eyes. Now, I was never much to look at, but I do feel sorry for my co-workers. Dealing with a grumpy Sonny Crocket wannabe scratching himself like a heroin junkie can't be fun.

On the flipside, I'm brushing my teeth more than ever. When you wake up at 12 and 4AM every morning and have to smell your own breath bouncing off of your son's cheek, nocturnal halitosis suddenly becomes relevant.

Cabin Fever

Like I mentioned, I'm spending *all* my time at work and at home. To be fair, it's mostly home. I'm working at home a bit, and spending even less time in the office than the rest of BEA NW these days. To make up for it, I try to send a piece of work email at each late night feeding to put out that "Wow -- Foster is really cranking on someting at 4:13AM" vibe. Not exactly keeping it real, but please -- you've never done it?

Proud Poppa

Look. I understand Sam is overexposed on this website, but really -- that's your problem if want to read it. What I need to keep in check is imposing my pride on people who don't ask for it. I took the kid out for a walk today using the Baby Bjorn and I really had to check my body language to make sure I wasn't strutting around like freaking John Travolta. As it turned out I probably went too far the other way -- I'd say more like Frankenstein with a baby tied to his chest.

I just sent some first bath pictures to the grandparents. I should make sure -- that's not peddling kiddie porn on the internet, is it? 'Cause I am terrified of prison. The only thing that scares me more than prison is kidney stones.

Posted by Mike at 08:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

This gives you an idea of how small he is. It reminds me of that old SNL skit with Gilda Radner sitting in the huge chair.

Update -- I thought this was wrong, so I looked it up. Apparently I'm remembering Lily Tomlin's character "Edith Ann" from "Laugh In". I don't know why I would remember that (or Gilda Radner for that matter). Both are before my time.

Another note: This onesie was on him for about 5 minutes before he peed on it and I had to change his clothes :)

Posted by Mike at 08:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Story time...

A nothing NCAA program from a hometown of mine has a dream season and lights a fire under their community. I jump on the bandwagon, follow them religiously, and watch them ascend into the top 10 out of nowhere.

The team is consistently disrespected by the media, but their computer ranking helps get them a postseason game tailor-made to prove their worth.

The big game: the also underestimated Louisville Cardinals, and though my boys aren't favored, even the talking heads agree that it is a great matchup. A win will provide the much-needed credibility.

Followed, of course, by the crushing loss to that Louisville team.

I'm crying about the UW basketball game last night, right? Well, that's part of it. But it hit me this morning. Why do I hate Louisville so much? Why does that particular shade of red make my eyes burn? Why does the sight of that stupid "tough" mascot make me wander to the cupboard, looking for toothpicks to stick under my toenails? Why do I feel like I've been here before? Well... I have.

RIP Dawgs -- I'll file you under "What If?" next to the '04 Boise State Broncos. And thanks for the pain Louisville. I hate your city. I now vow to never pronounce your name correctly again.

Posted by Mike at 05:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

A couple of people have commented on Sammy's toes. He has what a friend of mine refers to as "Cheeto Toes". Mmmmmm.

Posted by Mike at 08:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Wow. I had a post prepared in my mind yesterday on how I thought it was just a matter of time before GOOG bought Flickr. It was not an unpopular opinion. These links are harder to find today, however, because they are cluttered with the news that Yahoo bought Flickr yesterday.

Google seemed like a more natural fit to me because Flickr appeared to be biting their UI at every opportunity. I almost expected to see an "I'm Feeling Lucky" button somewhere on the site.

My first reaction to this is negative, because I was hoping to get Picasa 2 integration with Flickr and because I think Yahoo is more likely to ruin a good thing. Yahoo Photos doesn't exactly give me the warm fuzzies about where it may be heading, and AFAIK, Yahoo doesn't have a track record for exposing APIs or services to developers. Maybe this will kickstart Yahoo to turn over a new leaf, but I think it's more likely to turn out bad for current Flickr users.

Posted by Mike at 09:05 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

File this under... "If you send it, I'll eat it and post about it".

My Brother and Sister in-laws in Germany sent over a special treat with no explanation.

Check out the burp cloth on my shoulder. Just in case :)

Mmmm.... Nothing like a delicious Bi Fi Roll.

Posted by Mike at 07:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Watching the worst 1st round of tournament games ever, you actually start paying attention to the commercials :)

Update Sat. morn: We finally got some good games last night. I will now officially dial down my caustic attitude.

- The award for co-biggest sellouts goes to Darius Rucker (Hootie) and David Spade for their pimping of Burger King and Capital One, respectively.

- Those Saturn commercials are crazy. It seems like they have a certain person picked out for each of their cars, and they are selling it to just *that* person. Often what the character says has nothing to do with the car. Some examples:

1) Football Dad -- "I wanted to be that dad. That's why I bought a Saturn"

2) New Mom -- "He was 13 days late. That's why I bought a Saturn"

3) Can't Afford a BMW Guy -- "I could have spent more on a Z4, but I would have gotten a slower car. That's why I bought a Saturn"

4) Young Couple -- "I didn't settle for him, why would I for a car? That's why I bought a Saturn"

5) Biological Clock Woman -- "I don't have time to worry about what I drive... I'm too busy husband hunting and sniffing babies. That's why I bought a Saturn"

6) Hipster Kid -- "I really like my new way-too-tight jeans and vintage t-shirt. That's why I bought a Saturn"

7) Psycho Stalker -- "There is nothing quite as exhilarating as spending all night waiting in a parking garage for you. That's why I bought a Saturn"

...Ok I made a few of those up.

- CSI NY: Really? There is a CSI NY starring Gary Sinise? Lieutenant Dan -- has it come to this?

- Becky likes it when that geek in the Dancing Gecko Geico commercial pronounces via "vee-ahh" instead of "veye-ahh". These are the things you pick up on about the 247th viewing.

Posted by Mike at 01:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (18)

I guess it's probably been said before, but what is up with these lyrics?

Rock-a-bye baby, in the tree top
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall
And down will come baby, cradle and all

This is supposed to put my child to sleep? I know he doesn't understand much, but those lyrics are like "The Shining" for acrophobic infants. I am officially boycotting that song. I will, however, continue to stick with Nelly's "Hot In Herre" for changing time.

Posted by Mike at 12:34 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

- Yes, I know Sam is wearing the same clothes in all the pictures. We do wash them, I swear.

- Somehow this pic got widespread attention on Flickr. It has 573 views. The little baller is famous.

- Again, this one was shot by our pal Yetta. Mad props to her.

Posted by Mike at 09:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

This morning in the shower I was so tired, I put the conditioner right on my hair while the shampoo was still in. I know, not really a big deal, but for me it opened up one of life's larger existential mysteries:

Did the conditioner bake it's regular goodness into my hair, bringing along some of the more harsh chemicals of the shampoo? Or:

Did the shampoo simply wash away the conditioner, stripping everything in it's path off of my hair?

Which is more powerful? I must know. Seriously, there are a few of you out there with chemistry degrees -- Let me drink at the fount of your great knowledge and wisdom.

P.S: I don't want to hear any arguments about Pert Plus. Pert Plus is vile! 2-in-1 shampoos do not keep it real!. (Breathing...) For everyone's sake, we'll save my Pert Plus aversion rant for another day.

Posted by Mike at 10:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

<steve-irwin>
Here it is! I have captured the terrible diaper snake in it's native habitat, suburbia. I can finally die in peace.
</steve-irwin>

Posted by Mike at 11:34 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Update: 8:32 PM: Unbelievable, the Huskies got a #1 seed, and are going to Boise. A possible Elite 8 matchup with Gonzaga. Just a dream scenario.

As you might have guessed, I have spent a lot of time around the house lately. Coincidentally, the UW BB team has been playing well in the Pac-10 tournament so that means lots of blurry-eyed basketball gazing for me. Some random thoughts below.

The game last night -- It was good to see the Dawgs not settling for the outside shot, and getting back to the hustle-defense and dribble-penetration that sent them on that run at the end of last year. It feels like they were cruising thru the regular season for a while, and they just started to step it up again this weekend. To beat a team like Arizona even though Salim Stoudamire went off for 37 shows something. Stoudamire was playing out of his gourd last night. Frustrating, but fun to watch.

At the beginning of the year, Brandon Roy and Nate Robinson were considered the standouts on this team. With Roy's injury and Robinson's seeming indifference at times, it has let the other guys on the team step up. Namely Tre Simmons and Will Conroy. I think the resulting depth will make a big difference over the next couple of weeks. Even though Robinson seemed to take over at the end of the game last night, Simmons and Conroy were huge. What amazes me is that they still have a guy like Roy (probably a late 1st rounder in the draft) coming off the bench.

The tournament seed -- for my money, they better be a #2 seed when it's announced today. Hopefully in the homeland of Boise. There was talk of Arizona muscling their way into the last #1 with a win yesterday, and UW proved to be the better team. Look at the schedules/results of the two teams. There is not much difference other than UW taking 2 out of 3 from 'Zona. If those old white guys with laptops don't at least give them the last #2, I might just... well, probably take a nap or something.

Another note -- UW has not lost at home or on a neutral court this year (21-0). Maybe they'll run that to 27-0 in St. Louis in a few weeks.

Posted by Mike at 12:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

On the way to a hike up Mt. Si, Mark Griffith and I saw this truck. How 'bout that for a mission statement?

Posted by Mike at 08:16 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

My friend Tom doing a killer Kip impression.

Posted by Mike at 03:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Posted by Mike at 08:17 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Like any good conscientious consumer, I try to shop locally or in organic/natural places as much as I can. Mostly this involves avoiding chain resturants and big-box retailers. There are plenty of good reasons for this:

- Feed the local economy.

- Support earth-friendly shops and renewable resources.

- Subvert the big capitalist/media/advertising machine.

But most of all, I do it because my friends will shame me if I don't.

There are some things you just can't say to your friends anymore. For example -- "Maybe we should hit Applebee's after work tonight." Or -- "Hey, have you tried those new McDonald's Chicken Selects?"

Not that this is a bad thing. We should keep each other accountable. My point is that we all have our own guilty pleasures. Some people love the overwhemling scope of The Home Depot. Others can't resist saving a few bucks by buying CDs at Wal-Mart. My guilty pleasure is Chipotle.

Chipotle is an interesting case study because they are actively hiding their corporate identity. They are owned by McDonalds, but they avoid mentioning that anywhere, and they serve stuff like "free-range Niman ranch pork". Very tricky indeed. Couple that with the fact that they put an addictive substance on the order of crack cocaine in the salsa, and this place has to be conflicting a lot of Deaniacs.

So, how do I keep it real? For starters, I give my friends a break. I realize that Mrs. ikeepitreal might go into cardiac arrest without a regular dose of the Olive Garden, and in turn, I embrace my own guilty pleasures. If I'm going to give in for a Wendy's combo #6, the hell if I'm going to hide it.

Now the tricky part in all this is riding the line... you have to let people know that your consience is working, and you choose to give in. I don't let a Chipotle run go down without (subtly) mentioning something about McDonald's.

That way ya'll will know what is going on in my head -- I know this is wrong, but it just tastes soooooo good...

Posted by Mike at 04:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

A friend of mine had a lark to start a business making Lojak devices for pets. Give him $20 a month and he'll make sure your pet doesn't disappear. While I still think this is a terrible idea, it may have some merit. Looks like someone has already done it for babies.

Update 3/8 -- ok. Found the pet thing too.

The nurses at Overlake Hospital are *very* careful not to mix up babies or let one get away. Right after Sam was born he got one of these on his right ankle and a ID tag on his left ankle and right wrist (Mom and Dad got matching ones). If somehow he gets out of a certain set of doors with the ankle device on, an outer set of doors goes into lockdown.

Other strange rules:

- You aren't allowed to hold a baby outside of one of the rooms. They must always be wheeled around in the hospital-provided bassinet.

- When a nurse brings your kid back from a checkup or his (cough) circumcision, they get real serious and say "Sir, please read me your ID number". I appreciate the double-checking, but I think we got sent home with wrong kid. This one looks like he's Caucasian.

- You have to count all feedings and diapers on a special chart. A general rule of thumb is 1 diaper the first day, 2 the second, and so on. Since Sam made 8 special treats for Mom and Dad yesterday, I think we are doing ok on this rule. :)

Posted by Mike at 10:06 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Here he is! Click on the picture for the rest of the set.

Posted by Mike at 09:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Woooot! On Thursday morning a one Samuel Miles Foster was born after a long delivery for Mom and Baby. He is big (8lb, 8oz) and healthy.

Thanks to all the family and friends who came over and helped with the process. I've got nothing clever to say here 'cause Dad needs some sleep. More stories and pictures to come soon.

Posted by Mike at 09:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Don't try to stand on a balance ball. I know it sounds like fun. I know you may have the side of a treadmill to hold on to. I know you may have a cushy new carpet pad to fall on. Don't do it.

Posted by Mike at 08:56 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

In the past 5+ years at BEA, instant messaging has gone from nonexistent to ubiquitous, right there with email and face-to-face as the way communication gets done. This change is significant, but what is really interesting to me is the way people use IM statuses at work.

At first, the standard button-down "Away from my desk" or "Out to lunch" was commonplace. IM was just another boring tool. Somewhere along the line that changed. Here are some status trends I've seen:

- Using IM status instead of work at home or travelling mail. Bonus: this one really qualifies as a "status"!

- Using status to complete a sentence with your ID. Something like "ikeepitreal needs caffeine". Apparently doing this has a history going back to IRC.

- Lyrics to a song you are listening to. This turns into a trivia contest sometimes, with other people "echoing" your lyrics with lyrics from the same song in their status. Note: It is not cool to acknowledge someone's status with an IM. You must respond in kind.

- Linking to funny/cool stuff. Status links are the new email forwards! Not as intrusive, but every bit as distracting. To the point where I only look at status links a couple of times a day. This is also the category where people IM you to say "you are so going to get fired for that".

- Changing statuses while in a IM chat. This is a not-so-subtle way to talk smack. Let's say I'm playing someone at YM chess. I can change my status to "is good at chess" to let the world know, and get in a dig at my opponent at the same time. Two birds, baby.

Sometimes I really feel like I know someone even though all I get is strange glimpses into their personality via their statuses. Kind of sick, really. I'm going to get up from my desk and talk to someone now. Face-to-face!

Posted by Mike at 09:24 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)