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Tourist traps are funny. In a lot of famous or scenic places I've been to, some of the coolness is checked by sad examples of capitalism run amok just out of the frame. My friend Clay likes to tell about the Egyptian Pyramids being overrun with fast food restaurants. Here is a (pretty funny) cardboard cutout right across the street from the famous Belgian statue Manneken Pis.
Er, I guess this one is ok, seeing as the original statue *is* of a boy taking a leak.
This is my son Roscoe. He likes to drink beer and eat Saltines out on the porch. You never see Roscoe without his favorite "Wife Beater" tee. If Roscoe could grow a mullet, he would.
I recently went in on a used boat with Mark. This has inspired a lot of questions. I hope to clear some stuff up below:
Q -- You got a boat? What, you think you are big pimpin' now?
A -- If by "big pimpin'" you mean "splitting the cost of a 15 year old 17 foot boat'", then yes. I am "big pimpin'".
Q -- What happened to fuel-conscious Mike?
A -- Like everything in which I once (really) kept it real, this has gone by the wayside. I have a 4-Runner now too! To assuage my guilt, my Terra Pass is in the mail.
Q -- Dude. You know a sailboat is cooler, right?
A -- Yes.
Q -- Can you even waterski/wakeboard?
A -- Um, not really. Once I wakeboarded and caught some sick tiny air.
Q -- Can Sam go on it?
A -- Yes. We got a terribly cute life jacket for him, but he doesn't really like wearing it. After some fussiness, the boat seems to put him to sleep. But it seems to be more pain than it's worth right now.
Q -- Why?
A -- Lake Sammamish is *super* close to my house, and driving out to the middle of the lake and going swimming is one of the better parts of any week. Reminds me of my childhood in mountain lakes.
Q -- What does it look like?
A -- It's in the middle here. (I drove it to work today).
Q -- Sounds like fun! Can I come ride? Can I borrow it?
A -- It is. Yes! Maybe. I put a ridiculously anal set of instructions up here if the latter turns into a Yes!
Q -- Why are you so obsessed with this boat? Go to sleep.
A -- Becky?!? How did you get in here? What? Ok, how high?
It's a little crushing to one's self esteem when one's own 4 month-old son laughs hysterically every time he sees his father naked.
This story claims that A-Rod (also known in these parts as A-Wad, Gay-Rod , and Pay-Rod) Keeps it Real!
Um, no.
Call me biased -- I'm not sure of any circumstance where I would agree that A-Rod keeps it real, but this column is pretty ludicrous.
How exactly does A-Rod playing for the Dominican in the World Cup of Baseball keep it real? He was born in NYC, spent the ages of 4 to 8 in the Domincan, then moved to Miami. He's not a citizen of the DR. He should play for the U.S.
Wait... I take it back -- If Rodriguez was cast as the Christian Bale character in American Psycho, *that* would keep it real. That is pretty close to home.
Actually, you know what this whole thing reminds me of? This guy I know who was born in Washington State, spent the ages of 3 to 7 and 14 to 18 in Idaho -- and claims to be from the Gem State. How embarrasing for him.
Things overheard or seen today in Boulder, CO
- "No. I'm a MOUNTAIN BIKER. I ride 17 MILES a day."
- "What? He wanted 8 shots of espresso? What do you call *that*?"
- "This beef is organic, right?"
- "What we're trying to do is stuff a 15 pound ball into a 5 pound sack. We are all hoping that (our Eng. Director) increases the size of the sack."
- "Just about anyone will fit into any hammock. I fit people into the hammock that they like the best."
- "So that's 2 whole pounds of chevre?"
- "Do you guys sell underwear?" (guess who packed in a hurry)
- A group of 30+ people at an italian coffee shop at 7:45 AM silently and intently watching the Tour de France.
- "Oh I love that author! Sedaris' novels are the best." (David Sedaris writes non-fiction essays)
- "This one has superior wicking power."
I haven't posted a lot lately, as I've been rather busy. But in case there is anyone listening (anyone?) -- here is a good one I took in Copenhagen a couple of years ago.
This was a drive-in we ate at on the way thru Eastern ID a couple of weeks back. From the sign, I expected the resturant to have been around for a long time (like, say... when those signs were state of the art).
The Lost River Drive In opened for business in May 2005.