ikeepitreal

The three pacifiers are our weak attempt to help him find one himself in the middle of the night. So far, no luck with that. We amped it up to 5 last night :)

Posted by Mike at 10:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I bought this CD at a garage sale this weekend for 10 cents. Well actually, a quarter, because the lady didn't have proper change. When I listened to it and read the liner notes, I was suprised by a few things (and my suprise may reveal my utter ignorance of early 80's music and prog rock in general, but what the heck).

* Peter Gabriel wore makeup? That picture alone is worth a quarter. He looks like a cross between Bowie and Peter Criss (see I can drop a couple of names from the early '80's) .

* When they first stared making CDs, they didn't know a whole lot about the technology. Witness these two notes inside the liner:

The Compact Disc digital audio system offers the best possible sound reproduction -- on a small, convenient disc... No cleaning is necessary if the Compact Disc is always held by its edges and is replaced in its case directly after playing... Never use a solvent or abrasive cleaner to clean the disc. If you follow these suggestions, the Compact Disc will provide a lifetime of listening enjoyment.

The music on this Compact Digital Disc was originally recorded on analog equipment. We have attempted to preserve, as closely as possible, the sound of the original recording. Because of its high resolution, however, the Compact Disc can reveal limitations of the source tape.

What we know now:

- Digital encoding of any sort is inferior to high quality analog recording. It's funny that it was ever thought otherwise.

- I see people clean CDs all the time with windex/soap and water, etc. I think that's the preferred method of cleaning now.

- "A lifetime of listening enjoyment". There is a lot of concern now about so-called "CD rot". This is especially the case for early 80's manufactured CDs. And interestingly enough, the label side of the disc is the fragile side.

* I always got the impression that Gabriel was a great songwriter, but there are a couple of huge lyrical duds on this album. Check out the lyrics to "Shock the Monkey". Now imagine all the backup singers in the band chanting/grunting "SHOCK" repeateadly . If you get a chance, you have to listen to this song for the unintentional comedy factor.

* And Peter Gabriel keeps it real:

Although this album was compiled from four concerts in the Mid-West [sic] of the United States, some additional recording took place not a thousand miles away from the home of the artiste. The generic term of this process is "cheating"...

- Very cheeky Peter. You win points from me for your spelling of 'artiste' and for calling yourself out for altering a live recording. Way to keep it real.

Posted by Mike at 11:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Does anyone else remember chanting that when someone got called into the principal's office in elementary school? I miss those days. So here is my "Oooohhh, Busted!" moment of the week.

Overheard on Capitol Hill (the hip district of Seattle, where everyone wears way too tight jeans and ironic tee shirts, and would never be caught wearing big-chain clothing).

Hipster Chick Coffee Waitress: "Oh, that shirt is really cute. Where'd you get it?"

Hipster Chick Customer (wearing tight jeans, big jo-momma sunglasses, and a black shirt): "(long pause)... Um, The Gap... of all places (sheepish grin)."

Oooohhh, Busted!

Posted by Mike at 10:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I think instead of affecting a fake British accent (ala Madonna or the lead singer from The Killers), people should affect a fake British writing style. Writing is the new speaking after all. This could start with just spellings:

Should we meet at the centre of the city to practise our new programme?

Of course. It would be my honour to manoeuvre my way down there.
'
Then quickly move to a different style of 'humour' alltogether, ala the World's Funniest Joke. 1. 2.

Pretty soon we'll all be adding superflous silent 'e's at the end of words, and writing stupid jokes on our blogs about Dr. Watson.

1. Is it really the World's Funniest Joke if only Brits think it is funny?

2. This is like the "World Series". You know, the one contested between Boston and St. Louis?

Posted by Mike at 08:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I saw this T-Shirt the other day. Funny, but a true real-keeper wouldn't wear this, right?

I think not, but I am starting to get a little confused.

Posted by Mike at 11:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (46)

* I've added a couple of new 'features' to the site. On the right hand side I have links to sites I read every day and friends sites. You should check out both if you know what's good for you.

* I totally forgot today was September 19th. You know what September 19th is, don't you? TLAPD. I can't believe I missed most of it. Er... Avast ye mateys, I can't believe I be missin this fine grog. Or something like that.

* Do you ever think you are good enough to wash a spoon under running water without spraying yourself, only to get soaked? Um... me neither.

* Paparazzo is singular for paparazzi. That's pretty rad.

* Arby Horsey Ketchup? That is what they ask you at the Arby's drive thru. Mrs. ikeepitreal did a full spit take. I'm not a english major, but I'm pretty sure that's not an imperative sentence, much less a question. Also, this begs the question -- is there a training video out there where they teach new employees to say that?

* What is the <div> html tag for anyway? Divider? The others are pretty self-explanatory, but I refuse to look this one up. It doesn't appear to do anything if I add them or remove them from my Movable Type template.

* Former MTV VJ contest runner up and long time VJ Dave Holmes has a blog. Funny stuff. My question to you -- most successful reality TV contestant ever?

* Foof Chair or Love Sac? I can't be the only person out there to have pondered this.

Posted by Mike at 08:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Posted by Mike at 11:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Yesterday was my last day at BEA Systems. I found out about 1 year ago that BEA was moving the project I worked on (Apache Beehive and WebLogic Workshop integration with it) to Boulder, CO. My choice was to move to Boulder, or be laid off. I like Boulder a lot, but we are pretty settled here. So, ... I made myself stick it out thru the year because I think getting laid off is a rite of passage for software employees (plus the severence/unemployment will be nice).

BEA was a great place to work. I've been there almost 6 years, straight out of college, and worked with some amazing people. Actually, the timing is not unlike a professional baseball player who achieves his free agency after 6 years of service (usually around the age of 28). Of course, this analogy falls apart with the obvious compensation differences, skill level, and the fact that this hasn't exactly been a contract year for me. :|

I plan on staying home with Mrs. and Baby ikeepitreal for a while, dominating my fantasy football league, then hitting the books hard and boning up for the inevitable interview loops. We'll also be doing some travelling in the NW and getting Sam some Grandparents time. Ping me if you have some time off and would like to hang out with us somewhere.

Posted by Mike at 11:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

In response to Jean's initial post yesterday that blogging is just a "high-tech confessional", I've got something to get off my chest (and after this post I will say a couple of e-rosarys).

I ate at McDonalds today, and I liked it.

Now, I don't fancy myself as a hard core no-fast-food, no-chain-resturant type. I've posted about this before. 'Sok with me if you want to have a guilty pleasure. But McDonalds? Come on. We've all seen Super Size Me. They should just revoke my real-keeping license now.

I probably last ate at The Golden Arches a year ago, and that was one of those long road trips with nothing else in sight. And I got one of those fake-healthy whole wheat chicken sandwich things. Ah, who am I kidding? Enough rationalization. I ate McD's beef today for the first time in years, and I loved it! On with the post.

The Big Mac is good. Flipping good. Those beef-flavored fries? Delicious. And Jill M. is right that they mix the best Diet Coke anywhere 1. 2. Now, I'm not saying that I felt great afterwards. I'm not saying that my farts this afternoon didn't smell like burnt peanut butter. I'm not saying their resturant is a great institution, or doesn't often have confusing advertising. But it sure went down nicely (and if you followed all those double-negatives, a gold star for you). So for my confession:

"Bless me father, for I have not kept it real. I have consumated a relationship with a preservative filled 60+ grams of fat meal, and I enjoyed it. I pray that I will have the strength to resist temptation the next time I fill up with gas across the street from a McDonalds. 3."

1. Jill gets a McDonalds Diet Coke every morning, and somehow manages to avoid the food.

3. As a non-Catholic, I don't feel great about parodying a confessional, but it seems ok. Anyone offended? Mel Gibson, are you out there, or do you only read Aramaic blogs?

Posted by Mike at 05:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Me: "Um, I'll have the Pork Tenderloin Special. Can I get my tag to pay for it now?"

Guy: "No, man -- You're staying with me. That's a build-your-own sandwich. What kind of bread do you want?"

Me: "Uhhh, 12-grain."

Guy: "Ok, you get 2 spreads."

Me: "Alright. (long pause) The sun-dried tomato aioli and the fig spread"

Guy: "Damn, dude. I didn't think you knew what you were doing. But that's it! That's how it's done! Nice!!!"

Posted by Mike at 05:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

In college, I played in a jazz combo called "Nature Boy". We would play the college coffee shop once a week and open up concerts for the Jazz Band and Willamette Singers. The piano player, David King, recently took one of our recordings and added melodica to the head. The new recording is here.

Nature Boy lineup:

* David King: Piano, Melodica
* Matt Hoffman: Bass
* Phil "Hollywood" Hanson: Drums
* Yours Truly: Trumpet, Guitar, Harmonica, Vocals (with varying degrees of success)

BTW, if anyone knows how to get a hold of Phil or Matt, lemme know. :)

Posted by Mike at 03:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

A couple of weeks ago I picked up the Apple Mighty Mouse. One of the things I missed most about Windows was right-clicking, and -- I know, I know -- while I could have just used a regular 2-button mouse, I wanted to stay with the sexy Apple-branded style. Cuz that's how I roll...

Apple certainly thinks outside the box when creating hardware. Some of the biggest discussion points about this mouse are:

1) There is a little speaker in the mouse that makes a clicking sound when you scroll using the wheel. Kind of like the sound that ipods make while scrolling. Who thought of that? Is it easier to control scrolling when you can hear it? Mimicing physical clicking noises is pretty smart, IMHO.

2) The right-click trigger. The mouse still only has one clicking mechanism, but 2 sensors under the fingers to tell which is being pressed. Only thing is, they apparently only allow a right-click when your finger is completely off the left side. As this article points out, why even have a touch sensor on the right side? Anyway, this is a problem for the users who keep their index finger down while right-clicking (I don't do that, apparently). Pretty fun to test/fool though.

Other new features that I haven't found useful yet -- horizontal scrolling, squeeze buttons, and scroll wheel click. I've got the latter two turned on and tied to expose' and dashboard, but I don't use those anyway :)

Overall, I got what I expected -- a good optical mouse that allows me to right-click and looks and feels like an Apple product.

Posted by Mike at 07:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I knew I shouldn't have gotten that extra life insurance policy. Like Becky needed any more reason to "accidentally" off me.

Posted by Mike at 07:46 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I just had a brainstorm that will *definitely* make me my first million ;)

You know how the Dewey Decimal system is so easy to use? Don't you love writing down numbers that mean nothing, and using them to find what you are looking for? Aren't those little library pencils sooooo cute? Well, let's bring all of that wonderful user experience to the web by creating a library-style web directory.

Picture this: Instead of a url to get to a website, you use a dewey decimal system number -- and browse other similar numbers for pages that are also relevant. I'll go to the trouble of indexing this crazy thing we call the "information superhighway" under this system, and the world can reap the benefits.

Let's see how this will work. Here are the DDS main categories:

000 Generalities
100 Philosophy & psychology
200 Religion
300 Social sciences
400 Language
500 Natural sciences & math
600 Technology (Applied sciences)
700 The arts
800 Literature & rhetoric
900 Geography & history

Hmmm. I don't think that will quite cover it. I think we'll have to add the following categories:

1000 Gambling
1100 Porn
1200 Advertising for gambling and porn
1300 Inane blogs
1400 People arguing about useless crap
1500 People arguing about inane blog entries

Looks good. Funny, when I started this post it was meant to be a total farce. Now it kind of sounds like a good idea . It's probably just because I'm so tired I just washed my hands with lotion.

Venture capitalists -- line up now. I will be accepting funding bids for shhhhhhhhh.com throughout the fall.

"shhhhhhhhh.com -- because the URLs with fewer 'h's were taken".

Posted by Mike at 08:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Even before I got around to it, my buddy Scott did some good photoshohp work with the Tino picture. I look sexy!

Posted by Mike at 11:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)